form & content

what i dream of is an art of balance.
-henri matisse.

in my 4 years studying art history, i spent a lot of time thinking about form versus content. what the work is - what it means.

for example:

form: a figure wearing a yellow shirt.
content: judas iscariot wearing a yellow shirt to symbolize his cowardice.

so, what's more important? how a piece looks? or what it means? pop art or minimalism? (this is going somewhere. i promise.)

i dated a guy last spring. well, dated may be too strong a word, but we went out a couple of times. nice guy. hotcop and i called him "practice boy." it was a blind date fix-up by one of my then co-workers (random thought #1: i only agreed to it because i had a thing for the co-worker, who was engaged). the first time we hung out , we met my co-worker and his fiancee for a drink (random though #2: it was at the place i later met the celery stick. thank goodness that place closed). he was nice. we had pretty good conversation. (random thought #3: unless one participant is completely devoid of personality, or debilitatingly shy, it's really not that hard to have decent conversation). he asked if he could call. i agreed. i gave him a hug at the end of the evening. (random thought #4: it turned out he grew up across the street from hc, and i had met him a few times while we were growing up.)

he called while i was at work (random thought #5: i had funny hours at the time). i didn't call him back. he called again. this story could go on and on... but the real fact is: i just wasn't attracted to him.

the content was there, just not the form.

i went out with him a couple more times, i thought the attraction would grow. maybe he would make me laugh, or cry or angry or happy and all that attraction stuff would come later. (random fact #6: both hc and italian villa sister told me this wouldn't work.)

so, can content be enough? if the form just isn't what you want, can what the yellow shirt, or the witty remark, represent make up for it? hc and my sis say no, but i still wonder. in the long run, the paint is going to fade.

there is something to be said, though, for feeling attractive. or at least, feeling like your partner finds you attractive. there's just no hiding that.

i don't know.