royal beer

royal beer
Originally uploaded by kackie

could this glass be more stupid?

internets, it's true. we took advantage of them.

Here is my advice: if your is closing its doors, don't invite Joe, Brad and me. Chances are we'll perform some illegal and/or shady maneuver.

Here is my request: don't turn us in to the authorities.

I didn't even remember this first anecdote until last night. We were headed to a local Mexican place which was closing down after over 30 years of business. We were discussing what the restaurant would be like on its last night when Joe said "Knowing us, we'll walk out on the bill."

And that's when it came back to me. We neglected to pay our last tab at the infamous Wonder Bar. The place was mostly empty and only one bartender was working that night-- the random guy who always provided the worst service of all the waitstaff at WB. I think we only had one drink each that night. We discussed it for 10-15 minutes before ducking out when the bartender was at the other end of the bar. Please don't turn us in, we practically kept that place in business!!

I actually feel more guilty about what happened last night-- and I wasn't even party to it. When we arrived, the place was packed. I dropped off the guys to get our names on the list while I parked the car. When I got in, there were maybe 20 people waiting (mostly in parties of 3 or 4) and the guys were no where to be found. I called Joe. "We're in the back, at the table." Uh, ok.

I sat down at what was clearly a 2-top set for three and asked how they got seated so quickly.

When they walked in, Brad explained, the hostess was calling for "Joe, party of two." Joe (who claimed to be unaware of the fact that Brad had not yet put in our name) said, quite truthfully, "I'm Joe. Except, we have three. Right? Three?" He looked at Brad.

"Yep."

The hostess said it was fine, they could easily remedy that. Thus, we stole the table from poor Joe and his or her husband/wife/girlfriend/boyfriend/friend/companion/etc.

And the queso tasted that much cheesier.

beautiful bride, fun parties.

I had a great time, and cut several rugs. I think I danced more at Nora's wedding than at my own, if that is even possible. Here is a picture of me without a drink, you can tell it's early in the evening because I am not drenched in sweat:



And Tan:



Good times...

worst movie to watch when still fresh from a funeral, and your husband was out of town.

P.S. I Love You

Cried through most of the movie.

Vodka in the lemonade doesn't make it worse.

fun, busy weekend.

Not as wild for me, it seems, as it was for others.

As far as I know, all attendees still have all fingers and toes... and no "rules" were broken.

Hope you all had fun!

THIS IS COLORADO... GO HARD OR GO HOME!!

75 years of legal tastiness

New Beer's Eve - Cnn.com

Yum. Beer.

I'm pretty sure I learned to like (or not hate) beer at college. Many red plastic Solo cups of Natty Lite later, I have come to actually enjoy a tasty brew every now and then.

And I'm not the only one:

"It is the product of choice for underage drinking," said Michael Scippa, advocacy director for the Marin Institute, an alcohol industry watchdog group.

not your usual DMV post.

I (finally) carried my happy ass out to go get my Colorado driver's license. With apologies to LWC, who worked so hard for the birth certificate she did not need, the entire process was relatively painless. The process was 45 minutes start to finish, mostly because it took me a while to figure out that yes, the driver's license office was, in fact, in that shady looking shopping center.

I walked in, walked straight up to the counter, walked straight out to the ATM for the cash I needed, walked back in and up to the counter, and then over to the picture lady. When I commented on how efficient they were and how I brought a book, the picture lady told me I was welcome to sit down and wait if I wanted to. I declined.

This is a milestone in a couple of ways-- it will be my first non-Virginia license, and it was the first driver's license picture I've taken since 2001. The streak is over.

I topped off my excursion with a visit to the Superior Liquor Mart, just to prove that I really do belong in the Denver area. Can't believe they gave me a license. SUCKAAAAAAAAAZZZZZ!!

a stiff drink has saved my life every now and then, too

"The hospital's administrators were also very understanding when we explained our reasons for buying a case of vodka."

Poisoned Tourist Saved with Vodka

Pass the antifreeze?

last party for hotcop before The Big Day

The evening started great with pedicures all around. HotCop had no idea where we were going, thus the blindfold:



A typical downtown nite: Guadalajara dinner, popped across the street for drinks at Baxter's (where HC's friends thought the people were "stuck-up"), then a couple doors down for cocktails at Scotty Quixx (which the same girls who found people snobby at Baxter's loved... seriously). At Quixx we ran into a few guys I went to high school with, one of whom is marrying my dentist's daughter the same day HC is getting married. Also the same guy who tried to sell HC and P-har a $300 tree. Small world, man.

After Quixx it was time to leave Granby, so we ended up at McFadden's in good ol' H-Town. HC and I ran around, dancing, drinking and generally having a great time-- in the background I kept hearing them talk about some guy named Vanilla Ice. Why is this DJ calling himself Vanilla Ice? I wondered. Later, we caught back up with T-Cop who took us out back for a surprise.

As it turns out, it actually was Vanilla Ice. Or "Rob" as he likes to be called now:



I told him the confusion. I can't remember if he was amused.

Highlight- spinning around w/ HotCop on the dance floor.
Lowlight- when "Rob" signed the ass of HC's skirt, ruining it forever. Wish I had been sober enough to stop her from implementing that idea.

tuesday wine drunk

I've had more alcohol in the past 6 days than in the last month. That doesn't really say a lot because until this weekend I had maybe 3 glasses of wine.

Now it's Tuesday night and I can't seem to stop drinking this lovely, bright flavored wine with a bit of effervescence. Indeed. Nothing like a good Vinoh Verde, I always say.

I spent this last weekend with my sister, alternately watching baseball, eating lovely food, drinking martinis/beer/wine/port, shopping in stores, creating a registry and trying on wedding dresses. I feel so obsessed with and yet detached from this whole wedding planning process-- I'd really like a location picked and venue booked before I move. But at the same time, the truth is when it comes to my personal life lately I've been super lazy. And I don't want to spend a lot of money. But I want there to be good food. And cocktails and dancing. Chicago or Virginia? 2, 5, or 7 bridesmaids? Because, really, I can come up with more than 7 girls I'd like to be in the wedding. Reasonable, slightly unreasonable, or absolutely ridiculous?

I want it to be a party. Not like all the other weddings people have attended. I hate the bouquet toss, so none of that. They -always- have to call the girls out to come up to "try" to catch it. Meh. No thanks. Even HotCop isn't doing it (I hope.). In the Yellow Dress wedding, they did ALL the rituals. The bouquet toss, the garter toss, the cake smashing. I bitched about it to her. Are we going to have that? she half asked me, half asked P-har. Do YOU like the bouquet toss? I asked.

Oh HELL no.

Well, then...

P-har seems to think guys like the garter toss, so who knows. To me it seems a little... low brow? Old fashioned? I don't know. Off. Not me. (I'm not sure this is my decision tho.)

Of course, we've been engaged all of 2 1/2 weeks. Minds may be changed about any of this at any point in this process.

However, I've already had dreams that some girls I haven't talked to since high school were in the wedding (we went to get our hair done) and that either Lil Kim or Foxy Brown offered sage marital advice. Also a dream where Snoop Dogg did my highlights so I had to have a blood test. I really should stop reading WashingtonPost.com articles about Suge Knight.

Party Girl

This past weekend I did something I haven't done since the waning days of Decipher: I went out two nights in a row.

Friday night, we "celebrated" Brad's departure. You may have read about the departure elsewhere (scroll down to 3/29). Dave's pictures are much better composed than mine, but here is a picture of the honoree:



and the honoree and me*:



(good of me, not so good of Brad)

and this one, my favorite:



Saturday night was Sara's bachelorette party at Bar Norfolk. Why there, you may be asking yourself, that place is so dirty. Indeed, my friends, it is dirty. But they have the bar for dancing and the swing for swinging.

The honoree:



Me* and the maid of honor at the end of the night taken by the drunk bachelorette:



*please note how good my hair looks in all these pictures

huh

It would take many more words than I have in me to type to describe the events which transpired last night. So, I'll sum it up.

Erika
+
HotCop
+
HotCop's irritation at P-har
+
Wine
+
High School in a Glass
+
McFadden's
+
Shots
+
Party at the Neighbors
+
A Blurred Line Between CopTime and RoommateTime
=
A Very Unique Evening.

hangover's hangover

I stayed home yesterday with a case of dehydration so severe I could hardly walk across the room. And my pee was orange. ORANGE.

Anyway, I wasn't tired (just dizzy) so before 11 am I had watched everything worth watching on TiVo (read: everything that's not a cop show). Needless to say, my DVD player got a workout: Full Frontal (which, despite the fact I was fully awake, I napped through), Lost in Translation (which was pretty good for a movie in which nothing really happened. SERIOUSLY, you're in JAPAN. DO SOMETHING.), Chicago (wanted to watch that one again since I saw Queen Latifah on Inside the Actors Studio), and the second DVD of The Godfather, Part II (in which alot happened, even though Joe didn't think anything happened. Connie's back! Fredo's dead! Hope that didn't spoil anything!).

Today my brain got a workout as I returned to work with the flourescent lights (not good for the dizziness)and found out another in my department had been out Monday too, hanging out with his wife who's getting ready to have their first baby.

Never tequila, never mixed with whiskey, never on top of too little water to begin with. Never the two day hangover plus dizziness on the third day again.

train in va

One of my new employer's clients is a concert pavilion here in SoVa. For the company picnic on Friday, we all got tickets to see Train. We were also VIP, and I snuck in a camera.

Here is my picture of the band. We spent most of our time in the VIP tent with the drinks but felt we needed to make a token visit to our Gold Circle seats. Life as a VIP, so hard.

During said visit, I took this photo of my coworker and her fiancé. In return, she took this one of Joe and me.

Also, my former colleague now my new colleague was very sad his wife wasn't there. I assured him the rest of us were as well.

beer fest, redux

As I stated before my BeerFest '06 story is much shorter and soberer than my WineFest '05 story. That is to say: I did not buy five kegs, nor did I drink them.

It was great to spend time with Brian and My Lovely Tiffany again. Finally. When it's difficult to get any of us out of the house, it's difficult to get a chance to hang out.

Anyway, Brian, as it turns out, is heading to Guam on Monday. Although he is excited, this is how he feels to be leaving My Lovely Tiffany for three long weeks. Although, we may end up with more photos like this as a result. That is to say, MLT and I may actually be in the same city at the same time. Ahem. We found out someone from Guam beat him to the traveling, however.

Here you will see that Joe and I were there and that it was sunny. You can see the results of the sun on my shoulders now. Crispy. Here you will see that Brian is interested in something other than beer.

UNRELATED TO BEERFEST: My sister and Jeff Corwin.

That is all.

a different kind of drunk.

While I'm not as drunk as I was at the infamous Wine Fest, I'm certainly Not Sober(tm).

No "Before and After" this time-- sorry to all you who had faith in me to provide yet another unattractive photo of myself. Fear not-- soon I'll have something from moving day! Which will be counteracted with photos from Alden's wedding. It's all about balance, people.

st. paddy's pics

After only one drink:



No explanation necessary:



Ball or boob? You decide.



Designated Blarney Stone:

the morning after.

For those following along, what once was lost is now found.

like old times.

HotCop and I actually hung out together this weekend-- outside of church or our house. This was a big step in the friendship of two girls who would much rather watch TiVo on the couch than do just about anything.

So, we went to the happy hour she won. We hung out with a couple of her work colleagues: The One Who Was Engaged to His Cousin, The One I Went to Middle School With, The One Who Broke Her Foot While Having Sex and The One Whose Shoes Were Too Big.

Her best buddy on the force showed up late-night, but that was after the The Ebay Addict and I left because I was so drunk I couldn't hold myself up.

Quote of the Night: "If someone peed in me, I'd be pissed."

Big weekend, lotsa stuff went on, none of which will I write about on the internet.

Except: French Fries still = Miracle Hangover Cure.

my mom got me drunk.

Well, not quite but I did get really drunk at her house. By accident.

Thank goodness Joe was there to drive me home. I don't know how it happened. I stood up and suddenly I was wasted. Just blasted. I blame the wine.

Some bits:

HotCop: "I'm mad you didn't bring any food home."
Me: "I was too drunk to pack up food!"

Which was true, I had to get out the door before any of my parents' friends (and church members) realized I could barely walk across the room.

Mom: "I didn't keep an eye on her! I thought people her age could monitor themselves!"

She said this to HotCop at church on Sunday, because I was far too hungover to make it out of bed. Too hungover, even, to walk upstairs and ask my roommate if she would teach Sunday School for me. I called her cell phone from the house phone.

HotCop gave me a breathalyzer. I blew a 0.178, more than twice the legal limit here in the Commonwealth. Whew. HotCop loooves to give her drunk friends breathalyzers, it's like a game for her. She and her friend Wiz (who pulled me over once, but that is another story) experimented to see how alcohol affects men and women differently. Drink a beer, take the test. I want her to marry Wiz, but it's too late, he's already married. :-(

I told my mom about the breathalyzer. She speculated that maybe next year they should just have one on hand to test people as they leave.

Mom: "There was a lot of alcohol consumed. I kept making trips to the recycling bin and thinking 'What must the recycling people think?'"

Anyway, I started feeling reasonably well enough to go pick up my car about 7:30 last night. Made it over to Mom & Dad's house fine. Then I yakked up all the rice HotCop had made me. I broke down on the way home and got my cure. McDonald's #2, no onions with a Coke.

Except it's no longer #2. I had to ask the drive-thru lady if they still have the 2-cheeseburger meal. They did, whew. Cured. Well, mostly.

Tonight, I'm due to have drinks with Sara (of the literal broken neck). I think I'll have water.